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The Menagerie – and the wounds.
My parents cool deck needs some work. They do what they can, but I came out of a day of swimming looking like I’ve been beaten up. I had to explain each wound to my co-workers.
No, he doesn’t hit me.
No, this isn’t a ‘sex’ wound.
No, I didn’t fall down.
I DID take full advantage of the pool. But the coating on the side is like cut glass – and when they’ve spent as much as they have getting the INSIDE suitable for water and swimming, who could blame them for waiting on ‘aesthetics’?
Not me.
But I suffered. Every knuckle. Every knee. Every arm that hung onto the side to chat, then turn to respond to someone – injured. I can LOOK at something and be injured by it. It’s ridiculous. I bruise so easily.
I bleed easily too.
I will not speak of that night. Let’s just say, 95% of it was freaking awesome, and the other 5%? Well, when you have people imbibing and that love one another – shite happens. Because we feel safe being ourselves.
And sometimes ourselves isn’t who we want to be.
Then there was the ‘plank off’ which I INSISTED on – although my very fit mom told me was not a great idea. My core is still hurting today. LOL!
Here’s some pics from the party, then we’ll get to the menagerie.
Fun time was had by all – until it wasn’t a fun time.
I have GOT to learn to let go.
To appreciate what I have and quit living in the past.
ANYWAY – this thing showed up ….
Did I NOT tell Nic “no more critters???”
So, now he has like a dozen fish – a hamster (the first critter, whose name is Scarelett, but forever I will call ‘Scratchy’.) Now a Guinea Pig who looks at me with sad eyes.
I thought tonight, ‘Eff it!’ and brought Butters in. Let her explore the new smell.
She did great! But then … Draper marched in – and I, in my ninja, stupid, only human mode did a tuck and roll onto the floor I’ve only seen in movies.
Was enough to alarm the cat who I’m sure was thinking “What the ‘F’ is she DOING??????” And I twisted my toe.
SO unnecessarily twisted my toe. Add that to the injury list. LOL!
Sorry Paltrow, I can never be a body double, because I maim myself just LOOKING at something.
Animals are settled for the night.
Nic is gone, because he’s saying ‘bye for now’ to his true love going back to college out-of-state – and I have my honey working his arse off for his art.
And wounds.
Wounds I couldn’t let go that 5% of the night.
And very visible wounds I can’t stop saying ‘ouch!’ to today.
Musings from the Laundromat: Cars & Comic-Con
Comic-Con should have a villain called ‘Check Engine Light’ man. It would strike fear into the hearts of all who laid eyes on him.
Thought that was an apropos way to start since another Comic-Con is happening without me.
So that stays uncrossed on my bucket list.
Anyway! I digress.
Driving home from the grocery store last night and “DING!” said my car.
Now, this happened last year too. Car wouldn’t shift, RPMs climbed sky-high … I ended up driving 10 miles per hour home, shaking, heart pounding – then having my Cruiser towed to have an ignition switch and Solenoid replaced.
Shortly thereafter, “DING!” Turns out they put a bad solenoid in.
And my car was fixed.
And my bank account was broken.
Little over a month ago – same issue. “Ding!” Light back on, won’t shift, high RPMs – had car towed again.
(I like to think of a tow as a nice little ride for my car. Wind in its wipers, watering headlights as it enjoys the whoosh of air. A fun piggy back ride. Takes my mind off the ‘how the hell much is this going to cost me’ thoughts.)
Mechanic could find nothing wrong with it.
Of course.
They reset my engine light and for the past month or so, I’ve been driving it like it has a bomb taped under the hood.
Now, we know I ‘worry too much’. I’ve heard it enough. But I seriously have a 6th sense about things. And so when the “DING!” happened last night – and it repeated its symptoms, I stressed the heck out.
Decided there was no point to that. It is what it is right?
So I had a plan.
Get up early, go to Auto Zone for a diagnostic check – pray it coded with the same thing as last time so even if my car decided not to perform badly for the mechanic, I would have proof.
And it did.
It coded!!! With the exact same issue as the first go around.
I’m holding that diagnostic ticket like it came out of a Wonka bar and after laundry, I’ll set my car off on another adventure and pray the mechanic honors some sort of warranty.
Cars. They’re the bane of my existence. My kryptonite.
Seriously though, Marvel? Consider ‘Check Engine Light’ man.
Meat Mongers & Star Wars
I’ll begin with how the meat thing came up in an ironic way … 2 owners of the company I manage are very healthy eaters.
I, however, proclaimed out loud today that if they DID come up with meat grown from a petri dish, I’d be game. Hell yeah! Nothing creepier there than we already eat, PLUS, one less animal killed.
So it was odd that one of those ‘meat in a van’ people dropped by. No, not Schwans. You know the van … or truck … “I have one more packet of steak to sell, you can have it for five bucks!”
Yes.
Them.
Only, he walks in and:
Me: May I help you?
Him: I just came in to enjoy your air conditioning
Me: *slight laugh*
Him: Actually, You like meats?
Me: *stifling comments*
Because YES, not only do I like ‘meats’ but I’ve been craving a freaking burger ALL week. The whole office knows this.
They know this because if someone is leaving and another person asks “Where are you going?” I chime in with “To get Amanda a burger?”
I’m subtle. Very subtle. *stifling laugh again*
I was actually was willing to spill out cash yesterday and treat myself and my honey to a burger – however, when I arrived home, he was outside.
In his underwear.
Me: What are you doing? (remember, it’s HOT here)
Him: I got locked out. I’ve been out here 2 1/2 hours
Me: Why didn’t you go to the neighbors???
Him: I didn’t know your number
TANGENT>
He was NOT locked out in his undies, he removed his shorts for ‘an all over tan’ and was VERY disappointed that my English arm was tanner than his Indian blooded skin was above the thigh this morning after such outdoor suffering.
TANGENT OVER>
Me: (after we were inside and he started a movie) I really wanted to get a hamburger.
Him: I was just outside in the sun for 2 1/2 hours … not really interested in hamburgers.
So we ate Hummis.
Back to the meat.
Meat Guy: I’ve got rib eyes for 3-4 bucks!
And now I’m thinking, YES! I can buy a couple of steaks for the weekend. Because, have you SEEN the price of ‘cow’ these days???
My body craves the red!
My bank account says … Nope.
It only said “nope!” after I invited ‘it’ in with its wares.
Turns out I couldn’t buy just a ‘couple of steaks’ – it was a package deal.
And don’t you know, that for the low, low price of $179 I could get (and I’m remembering badly here) THE WHOLE BOX OF MEAT! Not just ONE box of ONE kind of meat – but THE WHOLE SHEBANG!
I don’t even buy hamburger meat anymore because it’s like SIX FUCKING DOLLARS for a teeny tiny packet of hamburger. 😦
I had to say no to my discount from $479 to $179 –
Here is my post to my honey:
Yeah, I pouted.
After this – my inbox was empty. I had almost completed a complex project I have been working on and I was done ‘braining’.
4:30. The room is empty.
I decide to see if there are any new Star Wars trailers.
Groovy thing about being Operations Manager. As long as my work is done, and it always is, checking a few things out online is ok.
Watched this:
I literally cringed when Anthony Daniels called himself CP30! CP30??? What happened?? Nerves?
So I’m still watching this and in comes one of the owners.
Her: Do you have time to order a home warranty?
Me: No, clearly I’m far too busy watching this Star Wars thing, on YouTube, on Company time.
(Of course I ordered the warranty. But that’s the rapport we have in the office and I love it.)
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Did end up having my son make a McDonalds run last night and ended up getting a cheeseburger happy meal. It didn’t hit the spot though –
I’m still up for some petri dish meat.
As for the carnivore carnies, if they come back – and if I have the cash, I think I’ll skip it. Check out these Yelp reviews. Pretty entertaining. http://www.yelp.com/biz/capital-meats-capitol-heights-2
Musings from the laundromat: Double Loads and Spilled Coffee
Got here an hour later than usual. I was greeted by a different crowd – ok, they didn’t technically ‘greet’ me … actually, it’s kind of odd here today. No one is smiling.
Everyone is pretty much keeping to themselves.
Lonesome Laundering.
ALL of the machines I like to use were mysteriously occupied, and I say ‘mysteriously’ because the ratio of actual humans in process of laundering, versus amount of machines didn’t make sense. Although, math never was my strong suit, so I’ll let the mystery be.
Shoved all my stuff in the ‘double load’ machines. Grrrr. I call bullshit on that label. First of all, you get as much in the ‘double’ load as you do in the ‘single load’. And they charge whatever the difference is between $2.25 and $1.65. Ok, I DO know this one … 60 extra cents! Highway robbery.
Anyway, after I’d stuffed the two machines … I wandered over to the counter area in search of coffee. Had just finished stirring in my powdered packet of creamer – AND gloriously knocked the entire cup over, which, went in the direction of the laundry lady’s work area.
Me: I’m SO sorry … I spilled!
Her: It’s ok, I was getting bored anyway
Me: Well, I’m sure this wasn’t on your dream list of things to occupy your time with …
She didn’t disagree, and I felt awful. Just horrible.
I helped clean up, then slinked off with another cup.
The dryer has stopped – think I’ll cut my losses, fold and get out of here before I spill something else.
Until the next Musing … have a great week – and don’t forget to eat your veggies!
What I’ve learned so far living with my guy
I was excited!
I was sure!
I was making room for another – and in all the insanity of removing 1/2 my life from my small home, it didn’t dawn on me right away that I was also …
TERRIFIED!
As comfortable as I was with my man – everything was about to change.
My routine would now include another.
And let’s face it, some of those routines have no room for another.
How was I going to use the bathroom?? How was I going to get through an entire night without ‘noises’ and I’m not talking about snoring.
How was I going to look as presentable as I did on Skype first thing in the morning?
There was maybe a week of ‘awkward’ as we both found our footing. He, learning to be ‘at home’ in a strange environment. Me, learning to be ‘at home’ with someone sharing it with me.
But then … everything just clicked into place.
If you’re living with the right person, things do fall into place.
Also, everything I was SO sure I NEEDED in a relationship (personal space, time apart, separate interests etc.) proved not to be so.
My DVR is piling up with shows I religiously watched B.J. <– ‘Before Jim’ (what did you THINK I meant?)
My living room rarely sees me anymore, (it startles now when I enter it) – the couch has forgotten what it’s like to have me nap on it.
Netflix is feeling pretty superior lately though. It’s getting a LOT of attention in our bedroom, and sometimes, it get’s ignored/paused.
But it doesn’t mind.
Then there’s the animals.
This was a recent post of Jim’s on Facebook:
The animals I was SO worried about not getting along clearly ARE getting along.
We’ve found our rhythm … our groove.
It helps that we have so much in common. It helps that we have history. It helps that we’re friends. It helps that we actually love each other. It helps that we both have a similar sense of humor and it definitely helps that we laugh … A LOT.
Onto the things I’ve learned … and I’ll get a little serious here:
- Men like to be spooned too! You can’t always be the little spoon. He’s chosen you to spend his life with – men need to feel adored, appreciated, cherished and loved as much as you do!
- You think your partner is beautiful sleeping, waking up, with food on their t-shirt etc. right? They feel the same way. And if they don’t – maybe you should reconsider your partner. Confidence and a smile go a lot further than lipstick any day!
- Too tired? Not feeling 100%? You are your partners one and only – and if they’re ‘desiring’ you, thank your lucky stars and be available. Of course, if you’re really exhausted or unwell, they’re going to understand and if they don’t – again – maybe you should reconsider your partner.
- Something bothering you? BRING IT UP! But, only after you make sure it’s an actual ‘bother’ and worth ‘bothering’ about. I learned this after bringing something up that probably I shouldn’t have. But, hey – live and learn.
- Say “Please” and “Thank You” Don’t take the love of your life for granted!
- Do things your partner will want to thank you for!
- Maintain SOME mystery … especially girls. OK, we know we’re all human – and have the same physical needs – and I’m guilty of NOT doing this in past relationships. No we’re not perfect windless Princesses – but waltzing into the bathroom while your man is shaving and readying yourself to evacuate your bowels is NOT SEXY. No it’s not. And I’m not going to even GOOGLE what probably is a niche that does find it so. *Shudder*
I know I’m going to make mistakes – I know there will be days he’s less enchanted with me. I know I may forget to say ‘Thank You’ from time to time – but I’m really going to try to remember my own advice, because it’s important to me. HE Is important to me. WE are important to me!
Debauchery Soup 
