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Little bugs, band-aids and bless you
Discombobulated this morning. I got plenty of sleep, as I knew I wanted to wake early and get ‘my’ washing machines here at the laundromat.
Success!
I was in motion, coffee was brewing then … a strange noise. Butters and I both stilled and cocked our heads wondering what the clatter was outside – grackles on the roof again.
Back in motion.
Decided to do 1/2 my bedding as I wasn’t feeling strong enough to carry two laundry baskets plus a quilt and pillow cases and sheets … I know I’m going to regret that when I get home.
I’ll wish the quilt was done too.
I arrive and my laundry lady starts chatting as I wait for her to give me a laundry card.
She pointed out a man in a hat, describing him as ‘the weird guy in the hat’. I followed her gaze to discover she was talking about my glaucoma guy.
Isn’t that odd.
Our perceptions of people and how they vary depending on our personal interactions with them.
I got an update from him about his eyes … he’s getting tired of the drops he’s putting in every day and wondering about marijuana cookies.
By then, another older gentleman joined the conversation and my glaucoma man turned into cataract man right before my eyes. (no pun intended)
Seems he’s certain the cataract surgery has given him glaucoma. The newest member of the conversation assured him that could not be the case.
All this as I’m typing and posting the guest edition before this post.
Then he left.
I looked up to see new eye-chat man studying something on the floor. It was a little tiny bug.
This really caught his attention – I mean … really. He got up, stood over it – and when his wife returned with her cart, pointed it out to her.
His wife just sneezed and he didn’t say ‘bless you’.
I mumbled it to her from my table.
Have they been together so long they don’t say ‘bless you’ anymore?
I hope I always say ‘bless you’. (I don’t think there’s much fear of that considering I’ll shout it to a perfect stranger from an aisle over when I’m at the grocery store.)
He’s been sitting holding a paper towel over a small cut on his elbow for sometime now …
I went and grabbed a band-aid from my laundry lady for him.
Now he can go back to focusing on any little bugs that might venture across the floor in front of him.
Musings from another Laundromat: Guest Writer Edition
A couple of Sunday’s ago I visited a local Laundromat to wash a quilt I had just finished.
It was a project I had been working on for nearly three years, which was destined to have a new home with my mother.
I love quilting. It’s a tradition deeply rooted in the past that can have immeasurable effects on the future, for generations, when people admire its beauty and enjoy its warmth.
While at the Laundromat, I passed the time by exchanging instant messages with my friend Amanda. We chatted mostly about feeling under the weather and the unpleasant midlife change we’re approaching. We started talking about a guest spot on her blog – musings from another Laundromat. During the conversation I made this comment…
Then I got to thinking, “do I really?” And that led to “do I spend too much time in the past?” When I think of the most interesting parts of my life, they almost always involve my 20’s. I toured North America performing at air shows in order to show citizens the capabilities of the Air Force’s F-16. I served in a war (which is associated with a long list of “interesting” moments).
Then I saw this post….
I mulled it over for days.
While I drove 14 hours to deliver my quilt I mulled it over some more. While I drove 14 hours home I mulled it to death. I came to the conclusion that I should really ignore the past, make some life changes, and have an interesting future.
When I got home a funny thing happened. You see, I have a Facebook page dedicated to the squadron I served in during Desert Shield/Storm.
For years it’s had about 30 members and doesn’t get much activity. A friend suggested that I expand it to include all our bases squadrons that served (we were all commingled during the war).
I did and something amazing happened. Membership doubled within hours.
Old friends were reminiscing and sharing stories, some that I had never heard before. I was flooded with THE PAST!
For days I reunited with people, heard about their new lives, and shared mine. It was great!
So great that I’ve decided I shouldn’t ignore the past at all. I should embrace it. I can’t be the only person who think their 20’s were the greatest years, right?
However, I do need to make some changes so I that I’ll have some good stories from this decade.
I’ve joined a gym. I’m shedding some pounds. My goal is to take a 17 mile hike to the top of mountain this summer. Sounds like a good story. Another piece of my “life quilt.”
And what is life? A crazy quilt;
Sorrow and joy, and grace and guilt,
With here and there a square of blue
For some old happiness we knew;
And so the hand of time will take
The fragments of our lives and make,
Out of life’s remnants, as they fall,
A thing of beauty, after all.
-Douglas Malloch. From The Romance of the Patchwork Quilt in America
Musings from the Laundromat: Brave bras, pink panties and a safe heart
There are three bras slung over the rail of a laundry cart … just out there for all to see. And no one is looking at them. Untrue, I can’t stop looking at them. I keep glancing up.
Here I am, the one who turns 50 shades of red when I drop a pair of panties on the ground whilst removing my dry load from the depths of an industrial dryer, gawking at the sheer bravery of these bras.
And I’m reminded … not everyone is interested in looking at your stuff.
I’m at a strange table again. And painfully aware that there are people behind me.
I hate having my back to people.
Anxiety girl!
I just glanced and saw a free table in the back … I’m moving!
AH! Much better.
When I walked in Of Monsters and Mens’ Little Talks was playing on the radio – and I smiled.
While driving here – Take me to Church was on in my car.
Like most everything else, I read too much into music. Today was no different, but in a good way. Felt like two good omens.
I wonder do we block out the songs that aren’t relevant to our current state of mind? Do our little ears perk up when one comes on that fits the soundtrack of our lives?
I’m sure there’s a very scientific explanation. Probably much like the phenomenon of hearing a new word for the first time, and then hearing it multiple times that day. Or getting a new car, and noticing the same car everywhere you go.
In tune to something you never paid much attention to before.
I’m in tune to lots of things about myself that I didn’t pay much attention to before. Feeling things I haven’t felt before. Cringing at some of my cat lady posts and all my ‘no one will ever complete me’ exclamations.
I feel like I found that last piece of a jigsaw puzzle. The piece that would make my beautiful little life a complete picture.
And I’m so hopeful. And very, very fortunate to have found someone who will temper my anxiety with a laid back attitude and a funny and creative view of things.
I’m also very, very fortunate to have found someone who will be so good for my such loved son.
An example of so many things. Patience. Persistency. Humor. Self acceptance. And love.
I’m the luckiest girl on the planet right now as far as I’m concerned.
My heart feels Home. And Safe. And, I just dropped a pair of pink panties from the washer onto the ground and only turned 25 shades of red.
See – progress!
10:15 … nah, it’s 4:30
I am bananas over my guy. And stayed up because he was worried about his best friends dog.
I had this song hit me – and thought about my very best friend.
The good times. The young times. The innocence and the not so innocent times.
And him.
Back in the college days, Lisa and I would get ready and go out.
Here we are through the years:
We always had such fun. Not only did we have music we swooned to, but she had TONS of clothes, and she would rock them with her pixie hair cut and I felt so … less than, and always loved her. We have memories of Nine Inch Nails … before you knew them. lol. And always will. I have a top she loaned me, that I still have. It’s too big on me now.
It’s weird isn’t it?
How we grow and who stays and who doesn’t? And when it comes to girlfriends, most of them stay.
But my best ‘boy’ friend back then … stayed. For the most part.
Life took him in a crazy direction – but I found him.
It’s very odd that the guy I didn’t realize meant so much, would end up being my ever after.
I find it more strange, that my son turned out to be just the epitome of him.
A marvel comic fan. A Dungeons and Dragons player – someone who marches to the beat of his own drum, and never has cared that anyone was in tune with him – while all along, he had a musical ability.
It’s crazy to me – that after 25 years, after clubs and ditching college classes and being my sons age – I should discover that the one I loved all along without knowing it, would be the one I loved.
I wrote to my sons girlfriend tonight. I told her I was sorry.
That I had forgotten what it was like to be 20. How important those feelings that I so easily discounted in my 40’s were back then.
They were important.
And real.
And if they mattered enough – they stuck in the 40’s … and still emerged butterflies.
Bumble bees and gas station burgers
It’s been a crazy week.
To say I’m glad it’s Friday is an understatement.
Being sick does not suit me. Hate it. Not that anyone LOVES being sick …. wait, no there are those who do. I’m not one of them.
So yesterday, I literally got dressed in the dark. (Good news is, today I got light bulbs on my lunch break – and after standing on three chairs in three different rooms, I am now ‘illuminated’)
I wore a pale yellow sweater, black skirt and black boots.
Saw my reflection in the office door as I was approaching it and thought “Crap. I look like a bumble bee.”
Not that I cared too much – I was saving all my energy to just get through the day – no time for vanity or caring about looking like an insect.
I had entirely too many clothes on by the way. Under my skirt were leggings – and under my sweater, a white tank top.
Felt like I was getting undressed every time I had to answer natures call.
Keep in mind – I was still fuzzy –and tired …
Next big event was me dressing after having answered natures call, and walking out of the bathroom with my skirt tucked into my leggings.
*sigh*
Classic.
Better than into my underwear I suppose (like above) –and it helped that no one else was in the office at the time.
Later I was hungry.
I hadn’t really been hungry for days. Because of this, I hadn’t packed a lunch.
I trotted (probably ‘trotted’ is a tad too energetic of a word) … alright, I shuffled over to the gas station and got a hot dog.
Then my stomach said “You don’t just want the hot dog! You’re hungrier than that!! Get more food!”
So I got the dreaded gas station cheeseburger.
About half an hour later, I went paler than I normally am … said ‘uh oh’ and then DID trot, okay, galloped to the rear of the building and said good-bye to my lunch.
Which became the news of the day.
Agents that came in were advised “Yeah, Amanda puked in your trash can” and me retorting “I did not! I made it to the bathroom!”
Good times.
I couldn’t have been happier to see 5 O’Clock. I took my bumble bee self home. Fell asleep on the couch fully dressed, bumble bee outfit and boots and all.
When I finally did get to bed – I fell hard!
Deep deep sleep until almost midnight. There was a disturbance in the force.
It was a good one though.
I awoke in time to see an IM that made me very happy.
I replied and went back to sleep.
This morning … I looked at the clock to see I had slept in by an hour and a half. I pretty much had 11 hours of sleep.
Jumped out of bed – grabbed my toothbrush, let the dog out. Filled her bowl with kibble. Dressed (mindful of insect imitations) and left a confused dog and a sick son and hit the road.
I’m never late.
Never.
And today was no exception.
I am SO ready for more sleep.
But! I’m skyping with the man I love and know I can sleep in tomorrow.
Debauchery Soup 