“To Delete or not to Delete, that is the question.”

Wonder if Shakespeare had the internet if he would have erased any of his works.  Maybe a poem he re-read in the morning and thought ‘That is crap – what was I thinking?’ (That is crapeth?)  But because someone took the trouble to type set and print and distribute, he couldn’t do a take back.

You know who I think would post something and have writers remorse?

Poe.

I can imagine him having a particularly morose day and  ingesting a bit of opium and pouring his heart out about unrequited cousin love.  Then waking up the next morning to the caw of a raven (Do ravens caw? I think they caw.  You’d think they’d crow.) anyway, waking up and slapping his forehead and groaning “Nevermore.”

I bet he’d delete.

What I’m getting to, via the scenic route, is that I contemplated taking my last post down.

I guess I wasn’t using large enough capitals when I said that I would never have done it.  (Take ALL the medicine.)  One tweet to me said ‘glad you didn’t kill yourself’ and I actually giggled – then thought, wait – did people not read ALL of my words?

It’s not a funny topic.  I’m not making light of it.  And believe me, I was disturbed by how easily the thought came to be – and if I’m going to be disturbed, I’m bringing you along for the ride.

Because that’s  what I do.

I will not delete.

There are diaries I threw away from my days of debauchery that I so wish I hadn’t.  I’m not making that mistake again.  Authentic – unedited – Me.   That’s what you get.

I share the Good, the Bad and the Ugly with you.

Only when it is my story to tell.

Trust me when I say, if I felt comfortable naming names of some people in my life, and completely removing my moral filter, there are posts that I  could write that would go viral and change lives  – and not for the better.

Which is why I don’t write them.

Great segue to my next random thought.

My Prince of 14 months finally traveled to my country very recently – however, not to my Kingdom.

That was a shot to the heart.

(Now I have Bon Jovi singing in my head)

I have eased some of the pain with lots and lots of ice cream.   Which is such a stereotypical ‘girl-with-broken-heart’ thing to do.  Yet SO unlike me.

I have never been a big ice cream fan.  But my son and I got into a little phase of banana splits recently and I got hooked.  I think mostly it’s all the whipped cream and nuts I put on top.

Maybe I should just have a ginormous bowl of whipped cream and nuts?  Or skip it and just go straight for the cream directly from the can.

I spent quality time yesterday with two bowls of rocky road ice cream (with copious amounts of whipped cream and nuts on top of course) and watched a couple of movies.

Last weekend my son found a blu-ray player that was a steal and I wanted to see what all the fuss was about.

(He’s still not here much by the way – I’ve mentioned him twice, which would give the impression he’s been around, having banana splits and buying electronics and whatnot. He returned late last night and I only have two nights with him before he leaves the nest again for another week.)

SO back to the fuss.  To be honest, I couldn’t see much of a difference.  Although, to be fair and even more honest, my eyesight isn’t what it used to be and HD and non-HD look pretty similar to me.

I rented these:

First let me mention that this deal Nic got on the blu-ray DVD player didn’t include a remote.

Next let me mention that not all ‘Universal’ remotes are universal.

I spent the better part of an hour trying to program one to the Sony BDP S360 with no success.

I almost threw in the towel and lamented the $4.75 I had spent on the rentals.  Then decided not to throw any towels and spent another half of an hour googling my little ‘want-to-watch-a -movie-and-don’t-want-to-have-wasted-this-money’ heart out until I found a code.

(I do this as a public service – if you have a Sony blu-ray HD DVD Player – and if you have a cable remote – try 21516 for Comcast and 1516 for Suddenlink.  It worked.)  Thank GAWD!

The Wolf of Wall Street was okay – probably all the hype elevated my expectations to an unreasonable height.  Leonardo is aging well though.

This Is 40 was okay as well.  I love the actors in anything they’re in.

When they said the part about the time between 40 and 60 being the best years of your life – I did a cursory glance around my empty living room and thought, well, I’m 5 years in and have 15 years to catch up.

American Hustle I did not watch.  The laundromat and DVD return box needed to be one trip – god forbid I exit the house twice on a Sunday.

Besides, my boy is home and laundry is done and the couch across from me won’t be empty today.

I’m staying put and enjoying what will be one of the best days of my week – and maybe sharing some of my ice cream.

Deleting trips away from loved ones is ‘to be’.

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*late breaking news – after publishing, and excitedly showing Nic the salmon and pie I planned for our dinner,  my boy announced he has plans for the day and night.    #@&*!!

I’m refraining from heading to the freezer …  but let’s face it, it’s inevitable.

Empty couch and ice cream are in my very near future.