Shivering and sheds and things …
“Mom, we can’t LIVE like this!”
My only child put his hands on my cheeks with sincerity in his eyes …
“It’s 72 degrees!!!!”
His hand were freaking cold.
Ok, I know – there are those of you living in places where you slip and slide attempting to drive to work – on black ice and through blinding snow. There are those of you whose pipes no doubt shall freeze – whose breath shall be visible in the chilled air.
I get it.
But how many of you have had an 80 degree drop? And it’s not even Winter yet for crying out loud!
I peeled my eyelids open this morning and seriously wondered if Fall could write me a note to get me out of work.
“To Whom It May Concern,
Amanda was unable to come in to work today due to the complete inability to remove herself from the barely comforting ‘comforter’ and exposing herself to the 50 degree temperatures within her home.
Signed,
Autumn.”
That wasn’t going to fly probably.
I braved it … and when I say ‘braved it’ I mean, I slid an arm out of the blanket next and grabbed for my sweatshirt. Slid a leg out and poked my foot into my Ugg boot – then had to actually sit up to accomplish the same for the other foot.
Butters has suddenly become a snuggler – surprise, surprise – and she lay all cute and curled up and watched me with feigned interest as I removed myself from my bed, bit by bit.
Oh how I wished I could turn on the heater! It was 50 degrees in the house (I discovered this as I briskly trotted back to the bedroom holding a microwaved cup of yesterdays coffee.)
My pilot light went out when I accidentally shut off the gas thinking it was the water main a few months back. (Remember that? Yeah well, now we have repercussions don’t we?) Although, this does put me in a position of not breaking my annual tradition of lighting the flipping pilot and my friends and followers laughing at me doing it.
You would think I’d remember how I did it the past year – but every time (4 years now) it’s a YouTube tutorial then an ‘Ok, here we go!’ big ass event.
Feel like a hero in a movie – “I’m goin’ in!” Braving the gas and the metal and the flames to bring warmth to my little family.
Butters feigns interest for that activity too.
It’s always super rewarding when I do accomplish it though.
Speaking of accomplishing things …
I think I mentioned in my last post that we get wind.
No, not that kind.
Bitter, crazy wind that snaps and huffs and puffs and blows things down.
This weekend it was my shed. Sharp metal panels were hanging dangerously – all I could think was that if I didn’t get out and do something about it, a piece was going to completely abandon the structure and go slicing off into the air and decapitate something.
So outside I went – early in the morning with my galvanized steel wire and pliers and proceeded to stitch it together the best I could. My fingers almost needed stitching – with the flapping metal panels snagging me as I attempted to secure the pieces together, I cut myself several times. It was probably a two-man job in such weather conditions and there were zero men – only me – (I have a new saying by the way “Don’t send a man in to do an Amanda job” – that was coined at work. Lol)
Anyway – Butters, again – is busy feigning interest – I think she was just glad I was outside with her somewhere other than the porch.
She abandoned me mid project to sniff around and bark at flying debris.
I kept stitching.
Don’t know why I bothered – this morning it was all sharply hanging and dangerous again.
I’ll probably get home to find a pair of ruby slippers sticking out from beneath it – if they’re fleece lined, I’ll keep ’em.
Musings from the Laundromat: Peace love and wind edition
Woke last night to the howling of wind – debris clashing about in my yard – the metal shed bending and snapping – and smiled. And curled into a tighter ball beneath my covers.
Oh how I LOVE this time of year! From 130 degrees to 50! It was 50 in the car on the way over to the laundromat this morning.
Deeeee-lightful!
I walked in and was greeted by a man in dark glasses, a leather biker vest and plaid shirt. “You made it!” He said.
I’ll chat with whomever strikes up a conversation with me – but I could not recall having struck one up with him these past laundromat years “Yeah!” I responded.
He then went on to share, as I filled my washing machines, how this wind is kicking dust up into his eyes and he just had cataract surgery.
So now I’m wondering if that’s why he’s talking to me – he thinks I’m someone else? I also hoped that meant he didn’t see the pair of underwear on the floor that escaped during the washing machine filling. (Seriously – EVERY time??? I have rebellious undies.)
________________________
Big news – I left the house yesterday.
You think I’m joking – but nope, I did. AND put makeup on. Eek!
It was an event for work and the theme was peace love and disco.
(The disco part proved to be difficult after 2 prime rib plates and 3 desserts, but I soldiered though it.)
It was amazing. Have to admit, I was going into full panic attack mode as I approached the venue and parked.
Didn’t help that as I was walking from my car to the building (a casino) two men came out and leered – one said “Thank YOOOU” to me. I had never wanted a trench coat to magically appear on me more in my life.
I entered the building and headed for the escalators – up I went – eyes front, as I heard wolf whistles from the bar below.
Okay, it’s nice to get a compliment from time to time, but I was CRINGING inside. Wishing that magical coat would appear and wrap tightly around me. Did not happen.
I decided to walk the rest of the way with my head up and a purposeful gait. Which probably only made me look like a stuck up hooker.
It’s quite a walk to the actual destination – but I made it. When I walked in – WOW! Amazing. The place was decked out! (My ipad isn’t really the best at capturing ‘wow’ especially in dimly lit rooms)
I found my people and anxiety level started to drop.
A friend of mine found me “How did they get you OUT?!” Ha ha – but she knows me.
I’ll share another picture – I can’t say what event, where or who my work family is – but I don’t think they’d mind me sharing anonymously. That’s me on the left – the 5th wheel. lol
Apparently there was a senator there – I don’t know my government officials so the coolness of that was sort of lost on me.
I did get to do the Hustle and my best Saturday Night Fever moves. I did get to laugh and watch as my work family accepted awards. And I’m not kidding when I say I had two plates of food. I hadn’t had red meat in a loooooong time – I was not fooling around when it came to eating last night!
And now it’s time to empty the drier – and PRAY no underwear dives to the floor as there is a table of 5 men next to my folding station.
Until next time –
A day in the life …
Happens to be one of my favorite Beatles songs – and (immediate tangent) if you haven’t yet seen ‘Good Old Freda’ on Netflix yet – and still claim to be a Beatles fan – then go watch it NOW.
On a serious note …
I arrived home – Ah, Friday! I stopped at the grocery store, came sauntering home with ice cream and dog treats – Noticed nice neighbor who was walking his dogs was battling a rogue dog in the neighborhood. I mean, seriously battling – yanking his pups on their leash and tossing rocks at the offending pup. After understanding earlier that my son left Butters outside (after an IM) and thinking it was she that had leapt the fence for some reason and was up the street – I peeled back out of my parking spot and realized my neighbor was battling another dog and it WASN’T Butters – thank goodness – I ‘covered him’ until he got home.
But, there are way too many dogs that are unattended and roam. Butters is only out when I’m home – and when I hear her urgently bark, my arse is outside checking things out and bringing her in.
Anyway!! Got home again.
Put groceries away – grabbed ipad – went outside (I have a peaceful and lovely view of a vacant lot if I put my blinders on – rabbits – quail – silence) put my feet up and was greeted by my unavoidable view of ‘THE neighbors’.
The ones I’ve discussed before.
I’ll keep this short – the video should bore you enough, explain a lot and take up enough of your time.
Bottom line – oldest daughter has graduated from hitting dog with hand to hitting dog with stick. Youngest child is copying oldest and doing same.
The dog that ‘suddenly’ appeared after they had a break in. Or – perceived break in? Who knows anymore.
I say enough in the video – so let’s let that speak a thousand words (and tangents) and any advice would be appreciated.
I will NOT just LEAVE! That would render me ‘Ostrich’ and those kids and that poor pup will still be in the same situation.
I have some solutions. I’m thinking tomorrow, I GO to the Sheriff department and just spill all I know. I have a home inspection next week and I plan to share all I know about the neighbors with them.
I’m doing all I can while protecting my own. And while I wish I was one of those people who did the right thing ‘come what may’ – I have others to think about. My son – my dog.
And when people are on drugs – and when people are violent – there’s no rationalizing with them.
Mirror Mirror on the Wall
What to say about this guest writer? I met this amazing woman when I was young – in my first real apartment working my first real full-time job – I think it’s safe to say where, as neither of us are near there anymore, Pebble Beach. (OMG, I was my sons age!) and my thoughts about her then were that she was a beautiful ‘broad’. Let me clarify. I think of ‘broad’ as a compliment. Someone who knows who she is, doesn’t take crap and knows where she wants to go. Spoke her mind, was amazing at her job and was someone I looked up to. I was blessed to get to be a part of her friend circle – I, to this day, have no clue why she let me in. I mean, I was seriously green – making all my first mistakes and was not anywhere close to being a ‘broad’. (Still not there yet lol).
I spent time with her and her husband Steve. House sat for them once and tended to their iguana? It was either a ginormous iguana or a wingless dragon that struck fear into my heart – but I did it because I felt honored to be asked.
I remember a military picnic of sorts with her and loved spending the time and loved that she invited me.
(Time plays tricks, did I house sit or just meet the dragon at that picnic??)
We lost touch, as people who carry on through life out of arms reach do – and found one another on Facebook years later.
Now we’re both moms and she’s still with her love. ( I LOVE that part)
A couple of years ago, she sent me a book and an essay she wrote. The deal was, I was to pay that forward, write my own essay, send it and the book to someone. I have greedily held onto the book – and the essay. I will forward it when I’m ready. When I feel I’m in a place to offer any kind of wisdom without feeling like I don’t even take my own advice.
I called her out on Facebook to be my next guest writer and she obliged. I give to you – Ann – (You can’t have all of her – just this for now. But trust me, she IS the sort of woman who would give you all of her. Kind, compassionate, generous, loving …. anyway – tangent)
Ok Here it is. Mirror Mirror On The Wall
I have always been aware of the mirrors on the wall. Big, small, ornate or simple I have greeted each mirror with the understanding that it is a true reflection of what is before it.
For many many years I have seen mirrors with both a true reflection and a “magnified” reflection. Assuming that the magnification was intended to witness blemishes and faults in the epidermis of us all I appreciated its purpose. Then suddenly the other day I realized its true purpose.
I am 50 and quite comfortable in my own skin and body and believe me it is not perfect. I was fortunate to have been at my best physically between the ages of 17 and 22. (thanks Mom & Dad for the good genes among other things).
So on to the mirror. It is two-faced; true and big. Going to apply simple eyeliner I threw on my “readers” as I can see virtually nothing without them, only to realize haha I cannot apply with them on.
Of course!
And then I know, it is an epiphany.
That is what the magnification side of the mirror is for, aging people applying make-up!
Just goes to prove viewing something from another perspective is always an opportunity for education. Different perspective, different answers. It is all in what you see and what you need.
Stark Vultures – and Star Wars and such
Then this morning ….
Contrails – then … accidental Star Wars
Debauchery Soup 