A Wider Shade of Pale
It’s no secret I’ve been what I called ‘comfort eating’, but what I’ve come to realize is that I eat when I’m bored.
I did not know this.
For the last 18 years, I haven’t really been bored.
Since my son has been in England, I’ve found myself with extra time on my hands – that translated into eating utensils in my hands.
I’ll get the annoying ‘thin person bitching about gaining weight’ part out of the way – because I’ve had a few eye rolls when I’ve mentioned the 8 pounds I gained. I know that I am not overweight and can usually be seen roaming the office with various food items in my clutches.
But, I’m NOT overweight as a result of effort on my part!
I lost over 40 pounds on purpose – over time, sensibly. (Alright, and it probably helped when I stopped drinking a thousand or so calories a day too.)
So those extra 8 pounds in (blush) two weeks bother me.
They especially bothered me the other night when I stripped down to put my pajamas on and it still looked like I had my underwear on.
The elastic left impressions where impressions haven’t been in a while. I gain weight, it goes straight to my arse. And stomach. My little arms stay little – and my boobs. Dammit.
Anyway, the private shame was soothed by some garlic cheese bread, so that was a relief.
This weekend was going to be the LAST of my eating debauchery. (I love how I gave myself one more weekend though – very kind of me.)
Started out well on my way when my boss brought me a muffin from one of his restaurants. Ok, I don’t know if ‘muffin’ is accurate. It was more like an unfrosted chocolate cake. But, for the sake of feeling okay about eating it before 9 am, we’ll call it ‘muffin’.
Then I couldn’t possibly NOT eat my sandwich I’d made for lunch … or my sweet potato Triscuits. Have you tried these things yet?? Try them. Do it.
Anyway, fast forward through the sandwich and the Triscuits – (which pretty much sums up how I consumed them funnily enough) something odd happened. I was chatting to a friend and we made lunch plans for tomorrow. AND I am excited about it because I get to see my friend and NOT because I will be in close proximity to food.
Who AM I??
I’m not only voluntarily leaving the house, but I’m doing it to be sociable AND I’m not concerned about the food??
I think my feeding frenzy is over. As suddenly as it began … the desire to feed seems to be over.
Nic returns at the end of the month, and I might just shed these ‘bored’ pounds before he arrives back on US soil. He’ll not have to see me waddling around the house with residual ‘bored bloat’. He’ll be spared that.
Which is a good thing – because I’m not buying larger underwear!