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Butters vs the chihuahua

Ah Tuesday morning.  I’d just waved goodbye to my sick son – feeling a little guilty sending him off to school as stuffy and half awake as he was. 

Fed the dog, grabbed some coffee – dressed in a long black skirt, a pink sweater and black knee-high boots. 

Plenty of time to relax and play a little Candy Crush on my ipad as I sat outside and enjoyed the breaking dawn.

Chaos erupted.

It sounded like a pretty gnarly dog fight. 

Crap. Where’s Butters??

I none so gingerly plonked my ipad onto my wicker table, spilled my coffee and panicked. 

What to grab? 

What’s going on? 

Get the mace??? 

No … that’s gonna hurt!  And let’s face it, since I don’t react too calmly in chaos, probably I’d be the one hurting when I accidentally sprayed myself in the eye instead of the source of the growling and frantic barking.

Big stick.  I spied a big stick and grabbed it – bravely and briskly walking toward the ruckus. 

Butters was going berserk.  Absolutely, totally, kitten on crack crazy over the neighbors chihuahua. 

butternose(The only picture I could find related to Chihuahuas and Butter lol)

It had slipped under its fence and was under some illusion that it stood a chance against my 65 lb Sharpei/Sherpherd mix. 

It stood (about 7 inches from the ground to the tip of it’s little snack like head) snapping and snarling from the opposite side of my barely-a-fence. 

It’s more like chicken wire … big gaping holes that a very small dog could simply walk right through and into the mouth of my dog.

Please know, Butters is by nature a lover, not a fighter. 

She gets excited when strange dogs go by – wags her tail and wants to play.  Cats – not so much.  And what she must have been thinking was “WHY is this cat barking and baring its teeth so close to my territory?!”  Meanwhile, she was jumping up on the flimsy ‘fence’ and trying to get at the ‘barking cat’.

My first attempt to separate them resulted in Butters slipping her collar.  (Insert Butter joke here _______)

My second attempt, after inserting stick in between dogs, left me with only one option. 

Pick up angry, barking, snarling dog and carry her inside.

Remember now, I’m wearing a long black skirt, pink sweater and boots. 


Sixty-five pounds feels a lot like one hundred and sixty-five pounds when it’s still snapping and wriggling and thrashing it’s hindquarters in an angry tantrum.

I plop her down in the house and catch my breath.  My heart is POUNDING.  I can not DO exertion.  No, seriously, I have sinus tachycardia, and walking up a flight of stairs feels like I’ve run a marathon. 

But no time to waste.  I have to leave for work in 20 minutes and there’s still the issue of the rat dog.

I exit from the side door, much to Butters chagrin.  I hear her miserable pleas as I meet up with the trouble maker outside. 

He follows me – rather pleasantly as I head to his house.

“C’mon, let’s get you home.”  He trots along beside me. 

Now,  Chihuahua lives with a friend.  Friend is a corgi.  Corgi seems nice enough. 

I arrive at my neighbors gate and read the ‘Beware of Dog’ sign. 

“Well”, I reason, “I’m WITH the dog”. 

And corgi is nice.

In I go.  Dog is now home and I ring the doorbell to let them know they need to patch the fence so tidbit doesn’t wander into Butterland.

No answer.

But I do now hear the corgi. 

Who proceeds to leap up and nip my arse!!!

Keep calm!  Dogs can smell fear!  Do NOT emit any dog-fear-pheromones!

I ring the bell again. 


I now have to make it from the front door – to the gate to exit.


The corgi is eyeballing me – and preparing to make another move.

I reach the gate and gently block the attack with my boot and scoot out to safety. 

I’m now left with having to patch up the escape route myself. 

I’m picking up rocks, pieces of wood – the dogs are at the fence, snapping at my hands when they get too close to their faces. 

10 minutes ’til I have to leave for work.

I decide I can’t risk coming home to carnage.  Butters will have to stay inside in our absence.

Felt awful all day.  Poor thing.  Was also praying she would use my bathroom if she couldn’t hold ‘it’.  (The tile being easier to clean I mean.  Obviously she can’t use the bathroom … I wish!)

Grabbed some ‘U’ fence posts on the way home (kissed $23 goodbye for those) – figured I could at least reinforce the ‘flimsy’ so she couldn’t leap out after the bugger.

Stopped by the neighbors, who still weren’t home, but did get to explain what happened to a friend of theirs who happened to be out front.

Came home, threw off my dog hair covered black skirt and pink sweater and went out to sledgehammer in those posts.

Considered using the hammer another way – but I borrowed it from a friend and don’t want to stick her with evidence.


Santa Paws is coming to town

Ah Christmas Eve!  The last advent doors are opened, the baking will be done, the dog is scooting on the carpet.  Wait, what?!

Christmas came early for Butters.  Apparently Santa Paws may have brought her worms.

Now, I saw her do ‘the scoot’ last night on the deck.  “Away from my chair, I flew like a flash, Tore open the front door and …” grabbed a flashlight.

I inspected the ‘scoot’ area – and didn’t see anything to be concerned about.

I needed a closer look.  I approached her casually, but I’m certain she could smell the ‘I’m up to something and pretending I’m not’ pheromones coming off of me.  I’m certain because she would not let me anywhere near her rear end with that light.

I did manage to sneak a peek at her bum when it was bedtime.  Saw a couple of little white specks.  Aw – a white Christmas too?  How sweet.

This morning I peeked again and didn’t see anything of significance. Okay – a fluke.  After all, we’ve had the heater on lately, perhaps she’s just itchy from the dryness? 

I’d almost relaxed when she did it again.  The scoot. 

It’s funny when someone elses dog does it.  It’s funny on YouTube.  It’s not funny when you’re thinking ‘Oh crap – I can’t afford to take her to the vet!’


**Disclaimer/tangent/interruption**  I am of the opinion that if you cannot afford to take care of an animals needs, you should not own a pet.  However, Butters found us.  She was in our yard one morning, hungry and skittish.  I put up signs around the neighborhood, listed her ‘found’ on Craigslist and even had her featured on our local TV station.  No one came forward.  We then put up signs looking for a home for her.  No takers.  She’s been with us for over two years now as ‘the pound’ was not an option for us**

Now where were we? 

Ah – the worry about the vet.  So now I have to know everything about worms.  Can they be treated at home?  Do you have to know what type of worm in order to do that?  Can humans contract the worm? 

Answers: Yes, it’s best if you do, yes. 

Outside I went – to find her latest ‘waste’.  I’ll skip the dissection description – let’s just say it involved a stick and a strong stomach.  No worms.  Hmmmm.  But did see some of those little specks again.

Back inside – I notice something on my freshly brushed couch.  Arg!  A segment??  I grabbed a sandwich bag and secured the evidence.  Back online.  Sure looked like a tapeworm segment to me!

tapeworm segment

Back to Google.  Yes, Pet Smart sells worming medicine! Okay!  Off we go!

I arrive at the shop and ask the cashier for the ‘dog expert’.  I’m given to a woman sporting a pony tail and on a mission.  I explain the scoot – I explain the specks.  I then lift my little bag out of my pocket and reveal ‘Exhibit A’.

“See, it looks like a sesame seed”.

“It sure does …” she says “It REALLY looks like a sesame seed”.

And then it hits me.  As I’m holding the bag high in the air.

The night before – my son and I indulged in a burger we’d seen on TV a few times and promised ourselves we’d get one day.

memphisburgerAnd just look at all those ‘Segments’ on top.

50 shades of embarrassed.

Still bought the chewable $30 D-Worm, after being reassured that if she doesn’t actually have worms, the medicine will not hurt her. 

Came home with my little seed and a funny story – and Butters took her D-Worm like a champ. 

She is walking around guarding her butt from me now though. Can’t say I blame her.


**If you suspect your dog has worms, you should address it immediately.  The medicine I purchased treats Tapeworms, Roundworms and Hookworms.  It’s a one time treatment – re-treat if you see signs that your dog may still have the parasites.  As for passing to humans – as long as you keep your fingers out of your mouth, you should be fine.  Animals CAN pass the worms onto a human, but it’s not very likely.  Wash your hands after touching your pet.  Wash your bedding etc. because even though you’re likely safe – your pet can ingest eggs they’ve expelled onto various surfaces and start the cycle again.  Lastly, don’t take my word for it – this is information I found as I can’t afford a visit to a vet – but a vet is always the best resource for anything wrong with your furry friend!

As promised – adorable kitteh pictures

So we’re breaking up the tone of my recent serious post streak with an adorable cat. (Of course, I have to ruin it by pointing out this is P.J.  the cat I mentioned in ‘The Stained Ceiling’ that I had to have put to sleep December 23rd 2011). 

Here he is just being adorable …

And here ‘Peej’ (as we called him around here) is Karate cat!

But he wasn’t just adorable fluff and an epic poser – he was a great hunter!  Seriously, he brought a live pigeon into my house over the river – through an open downstairs window.  The pigeon made it – this lizard, not so lucky.

Then Butters showed up and adopted us.  He took it in stride.

We still miss and love you Peej.  x

Have a Wednesday morning smile

Happy Hump Day!  Here’s Butters to put a smile on your face.


Just laying here with my pup … was this your bed?

Taking my pup and getting out of here – damn puparrazi!

A little close with that camera!