Guilty wishes – dark thoughts.


It’s still too early to sleep – but that’s what I want.

How do I feel?  I feel dank.

image

Dank and dark and hopeless – and hopeful and grateful all at the same time.

Does that make sense?  No.

I feel like I have been peeled alive and felt every bit of it, but am still grateful for being alive.

image

I am missing my mum.

I am hating what is the ‘waiting game’.  Knowing everyone gets what the outcome is.

Horrific isn’t it?  That I’m waiting day by day (as is she, but MUCH more personally) for the ‘finale’

image

I won’t put a full stop there on purpose.

It is not a mistake in the sentence.

image

And there will be no mistaking the grief.

I feel guilty for wanting my mum home, because it will be when her mum, and my Nannie has passed.

 

Advertisements

About debaucherysoup

I've traveled 4 continents, affording me experiences and adventures to last a lifetime. Most important was the exposure to other cultures, beliefs and lifestyles. I'm also mom to one of the most amazing human beings I know.

Posted on January 10, 2016, in Love, Motherhood, Photography & Art, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: