My (too?) gay proud memo moment
Just had a very eye-opening experience.
I get memos all the time from lenders – I’m alerted when rates improve or worsen, when a new program is available and when there is a change in procedures with an existing program.
So I’m sitting and working and ‘ding!’ I have an email from a lender we use a lot.
Ever have a moment when you feel like you’re part of something important? Historical? When you know you won’t soon forget the moment you’re in and have a feeling your children might remember it too?
I was a student aid for the attendance office in high school. On January 28, 1986, I was in that office when I had to deliver a note to each classroom advising the teachers and students that we lost 7 souls on Space Shuttle Challenger. (It wouldn’t be until a few years later when the gravity of that task hit me.)
I still have the rate sheets from 9/11 – the alerts and market suspensions.
And today – a good moment.
I read the following memo and knew that I was part of a special moment:
“Effective immediately, on a case-by-case basis, VA will provide the home loan guaranty benefit to same-sex married couples in a manner consistent with the benefit currently in place for opposite-sex married couples. After reviewing the following information, VA will determine whether a same-sex married couple can be qualified for a VA loan using the income of both spouses:
- Date and State of marriage
- State of residence at the time of marriage
- State in which the subject property is located
- State in which the couple currently resides
- Estimated closing date of the VA loan”
(Etc. I won’t type the whole email – I don’t need a plagiarism suit)
So! I’m reading this – and the grin on my face is getting bigger and bigger … The fact that it’s the VA loan is even more exciting to me. From “Don’t ask don’t tell” to VA home loan benefit for same-sex couples?
Now – I ran with the ‘very cool’ sentiment, literally.
Holding the memo that I printed, like Charlie held that golden ticket, I breathlessly shared the news with whomever would listen. My eyes glistening with a shiny happy ‘very cool’ glaze.
Did not – for ONE second – occur to me that not everyone would share my excitement or my opinion.
I mean – seriously, NEVER did the thought that perhaps not everyone would be as shiny eyed as me over it, enter my mind. At all. Ever.
I mentioned to the first person I told (after my eye-opening experience) that I needed to look at that. I needed to look at the fact that I didn’t think anyone would have differing opinions. He said, “Well … you wouldn’t.”
That made me feel a little better (but not less naïve). I’m not comfortable that the thought wouldn’t occur to me that not everyone was open-minded and for equality.
And I’m still surprised.
Oh well, years from now, when my great-grandchildren are thinking I’m pulling their leg about same-sexed couples being treated differently at one time – I’ll get to share with them the story of ‘the memo’.
Posted on October 3, 2013, in Uncategorized and tagged don't ask don't tell, equality, gay pride, naivety, same-sex couples, VA, VA home loan benefit for same-sex couples. Bookmark the permalink. 8 Comments.