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Debauchery Soup (Okay, everything but soup)

This weekend was pure culinary debauchery.  I ate a ridiculous amount of food.

Somehow this was all that was left of 2 dozen fresh baked cookies (Cranberry white chocolate and chocolate chunk in case you’re wondering)

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Yeah, that would make 19 that I consumed yesterday.  I do not know how.  I just know that the proof is in the picture.  (I ate one this morning if you’re doing the math and not coming up with 19)

I also had a healthy baked potato for lunch.  Albeit, it was hidden under sour cream, cheese, red bell peppers, spring onions and Southwest chicken pieces.

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I did take time to play with the food a little before indulging.  These were my ‘left over veggie flower’ photos:

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It didn’t stop there.  I was still hungry after my potato.  So I tried for healthy:

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Then skipped to unhealthy and had two bowls of this fun cereal.  (Let me tell you, they do NOT skimp on the marshmallows!)

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This comfort eating has to stop.

And it has for now … as I noticed that between the time I brushed my teeth this morning, and approximately 1:00 pm, I had broken my front tooth!!

I don’t bite down on my front teeth – so I have no CLUE how I did it.  But done it is.

I feel like I look like this:

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But it really looks like this:

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See – the tooth above the ‘S’.

Ug!  So, back to the dentist tomorrow.

Anyway, back to food.

I’m known around the office for being thin, yet always eating.  So it was no surprise when a realtor came to me to ask about a plate of cookies that mysteriously appeared on her desk with an illegible thank-you card.

Surely she didn’t think I left them??  A) I would never leave cookies unattended and B) I would never part with cookies.

I’m leaving you a treat – it would be something wrapped and sealed so tight I couldn’t be tempted to get into it.

I was however, able to make a positive ID for her on what the hand that was holding said plate of cookies looked like.

Hey, if cookies are walking by the office, my radar goes off.  I could also confirm that the cookies were shaded by a hat on the head of unidentified cookie bearer and that the delivery occurred on Friday afternoon.

I’m so helpful.

If ever called to help police as a witness, their suspect better have been holding food.

Tonight, I fast.

It’s not going to be hard … as I brought a banana for breakfast – cheese, salad and turkey sandwich and tortilla chips for lunch, and then my boss announced he’d brought chili for us.  Score!

This is my actual stomach – and it is grateful.  But it had better not get used to such feeding frenzies.

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I’m done!

Wait … would you look at the dogs food!!! 

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The hairy raspberry

Had a hungry day today – which happened to coincide with an office meeting next door that had a veritable buffet in the break room.  I tried the ‘I’ll just take half a donut, and some fruit’ route – but that didn’t last long.  Half a donut and some fruit is an appetizer really.

I traveled back for another half a donut and some more fruit.

Whilst in a sugar stupor,  I stared at the raspberries on my plate and wondered “why do they have hair?”

My first thought was, ‘oh – maybe to ward off pests and small critters from nibbling them while they’re growing’.  But that hardly seemed a fair hand dealt by nature for the poor,  defenseless, bald blueberries on my plate!

I obsess over things like this.  I do.  Anything I don’t know I HAVE to know.

In a moment of quiet at my desk, I guiltily Googled ‘why do raspberries have hair?’.  (A sentence I never thought I’d type).

Well!  It’s to help them seed.  They are the remnants of the pistils, the female portion of the flower.  Big let down.  I wanted them to have some really bizarre secret life or something.

I didn’t wonder anything about my sandwich or chips.  Didn’t wonder much about the Raisinets I wolfed down after my initial sugar high dissipated either.

Pretty sure I’m skipping dinner.