Finding myself on a hamster wheel.  I reached out tonight to a friend so I wouldn’t be morose in bed, hugging on to my teddy – my 40 year old touchstone.

I’m tired of listening to my own thoughts, so I can only imagine how you must feel reading them.

I know what it is important in life.  Love – family – serenity – service – enduring friendships.

I’m burned out on the wheel though.

If I had a magic wand, it would put me somewhere with a future.  A chance to spread my wings and not have them operated by ‘must’.  Must fly here – must fly there – must not touch the light.

I wrote this poem years ago, and it’s become a metaphor for what could have been.

“In memory of …” the tomb began,

I could not read much more.

My loss engraved in cold grey stone, was too much to endure.

I turned away, too pained to stay,

And walked to clear my mind.

All the while regretting what I had to leave behind.