Well, one toe to be specific.
I am a dork. A klutz.
An awkward bundle of looking like a put together female on the outside and a Star Wars loving, cartoon watching, zombie adoring, comic book and action figure collecting, insecure teenaged boy on the inside.
This week I got my 3rd head cold in 4 months – a record for Miss. I-never-get-sick.
As I said yesterday, awkwardly, on Facebook, if I could itch the back of my eyeball, throat and ear with my tongue, I’d be golden.
Worked Monday and Tuesday with a fever and a leaking face – as did my boss.
I swear, our office should be quarantined at certain times of the year!
One ‘carrier’ comes near the building and the rest of us fall in groups of diseased worker bees – then keep passing it back and forth.
But I’m hearty. My boss and I sneezed and sniffled greetings to one another and carried on.
I’m leading up to something here.
I gave birth ‘au naturale’, I worked the day after I broke my wrist on the busiest day of the month – writing with my left hand like a chicken scratch trooper – I will only stay home if I absolutely can’t make it.
But today, I cried like a toddler after a stupid toe injury.
I started the day fuzzy – having not slept well – my mouth felt like a nest of scratching, very furry kittens had slept in it.
I took cold meds and remembered it was the day I had to be at the office early.
I skipped a shower, hurriedly dressed, threw kibble in the dogs bowl and headed to the car.
Then I sat there – in the driver’s seat and realized I was ahead of myself by over half an hour.
Got out of car – shuffled back into the house, grabbed another cup of obviously much-needed coffee and sat dazed on the couch.
The clock ticked by and I wished I had taken my shower.
When I did arrive at work, I was in hyper-drive mode. Lots of physical things to take care of. Cleaned, sorted out an office – back and forth, back and forth.
Then nature called.
As I was exiting the bathroom I opened the door only to have it stop half way. It hit a door stop.
Door stop was my toe.
Now, I’m in ‘Oh God this really hurts and I’m afraid to look at what I’ve done’ mode.
Then I realize … door is still stopped half way … on my toe.
And the knowledge that I now have to basically run my toe over AGAIN is dawning on me.
I closed my eyes and WHAM – got the door ‘off’ my toe.
Tears filled my eyes … and since I have a high threshold for pain, I’m scaring myself with my body’s reaction and definitely not wanting to look down.
Seriously, the breath was literally snatched out of me. That ‘whooomf’ of adrenaline and pain rippled through my body.
I must have made a noise, because someone, not sure who at the time, noticed me.
I hobbled to the kitchen, bleeding on my shoe.
My boss went for the first-aid kit and a co-worker came to help.
I felt like an idiot.
Trying not to cry, and not succeeding.
I remember my co-worker (that sounds so formal, she’s my friend too, as is my boss) telling me that it would be okay to swear.
I also remember thinking I REALLY wish I’d showered as they were looking closely at my foot.
And I do remember saying – “I already don’t feel well … and now I’ve hurt my tooooooe”
My boss said I could go home – and since being at my tall desk is the exact opposite of elevating my foot – I took her up on it.
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It bled for over 3 1/2 hours.
I’m pretty sure I may have fractured it above the toe knuckle. Is that what it’s called?
Because it bends – but when I step flat (which, I won’t be doing again anytime soon) the wind is knocked out of me and a shocking pain goes up my foot.
Of course, I won’t know this for sure as I can’t go to the doctor.
Besides, there’s nothing they can really do.
(Unless this nerd goes to a doctor whose last name is Who)